Day 4, Trusting Acceptance

posted on Thu, 01/14/2010 - 23:41

Day 4 of the iZO Cleanze complete. As you can see in the above video, the day didn’t exactly start out pretty.

And crazily enough that means ‘good news!’ It means the cleanse is working. Oy. What a strange thing it is to be happy about feeling like shit. Damn, I was soooooo heavy this morning. I really kicked up the internal dirt last night with what I’ve referred to as the ‘Transformation Hat Trick’. I got a always-super-Loving colonic from Leah at Clear Way to Health in Mar Vista at 5pm. Then it was on to Yoga with Julian Walker at Santa Monica Yoga. I was feeling so light and energized from my colonic that I really ripped it in Yoga, stretching my body to lengths I hadn’t enjoyed in months, so much so that Julian commented that I was ‘looking strong’. Nice. And then I rounded out the day with another superdeep tissue massage from Karl.

Needless to say, all of this must’ve put the squeeze on those toxic buggers in me body cuz I woke up like I was hung over, as is quite apparent in the video. But as I predicted in the video, a few good bowel movements straightened my ass out indeed! Gotta keep those toxins on the run(s)! By the end of the day, I was totally wired with energy. It’s simple: When I’m on the cleanse or eating healthy, I feel so sharp and focused. I can almost be too sharp, and that’s why I’ll be integrating the Spiritual component of my 21 day journey starting this weekend: I need to maintain a level of peace throughout my being or else I’ll lose my mind with the intensity of Life.

Something that has been bothering me is that I haven’t been writing my blog as much as I’d like, but hey, 2 out of 4 days ain’t bad. And I’ve twittered multiple times every day this week. (pats self on the back.) Actually I’m feeling better as I write this now- I was getting quite nervous that I wasn’t going to be able to get to it today. I could feel the intense self-judgment coming on, about to smack me top side the head. I can be so damn unforgiving of myself when I don’t do what I say I’m going to do. But here we are, blahhhhhhging. Whew. I am determined to make this daily and, I. Am. Daily. NOW!

It’s honestly very hard to juggle the complexity of my days. It can be quite overwhelming as the CEO of a small business. I’ll have an intention to start off the day Right with Spiritual practice and blogging and I’ll blink... and the day is over. Just like that. I get swept off by a wave, my intentions washed away by a ‘Quadrant One’ sea of urgency (referring to Stephen Covey’s ‘Seven Habits of Highly Effective People’), and I feel out of control, reacting to events instead of manifesting my intentions. Frankly it’s been quite frustrating for me for the last two years. And we all know that frustration almost inevitably breeds anger.

Yes, I must admit that I have serious accumulated anger from my frustrated will not accomplishing things as quickly with the iZO Cleanze as I would like. I know, I know- People tell me i’m crazy to think that i’m not moving quickly enough: ‘Look at all you’ve accomplished! Are you nuts?!?’ And they’re right. Besides getting a mammoth undertaking off the ground that benefits people and the planet in a very tangible way, we did just survive the craziest economic warzone of the last 80 years. And now we’re poised for explosion in a good way.

But the issue for me is that I saw all of this in a blink of an eye a few years ago, and I’ve known for a long time what the future looks like, at least with the iZO Cleanze (in a general, essential way), and i’m like, ‘This should not have taken so long!’ There have have been so many mistakes that should’ve been avoided. I should’ve known better to get involved with certain people who slowed me down. I should’ve been stronger in my own integrity, the lack of which has slowed me down. I should’ve because i knew better. I have been so friggin’ impatient, my soul has been suffocating from the failed expectations. (sigh) But I’m working on this ‘should’ve SHIT’.... through meditating on ‘trusting acceptance’. Here’s the affirmation that I created as part of my USM curriculum:

I am wholeheartedly Loving and in complete acceptance of present reality, trusting that all my goals, dreams, and aspirations are manifesting at the ideal time and place to maximize my commitment to raise the vibration of mySelf and the planet.

As I look back on the past few years, I just have to accept that there was incredible understanding and wisdom that was forged in the furnaces of experiential chaos that I’ve navigated. I have to be impressed with the fact that although it often felt like I was walking in quicksand, I relentlessly plugged away and checked off those tasks, one by one. And I have to rejoice that I am finally where I’ve wanted to be with this venture for the past 3 years, and hell, for the past 14 years of my entrepreneurial career: I am finally out of the ‘getting my ducks in a row’ phase. It’s a definite line that i’m crossing as I write this. This is big for me. This is new territory. I’ve come close many times. This time I cross over. Here we go.

Big news coming next week! A major milestone in iZO’s evolution. Something I’ve been working on for over two years. I am very excited.